(credits : Google)
From a perfect education to a perfect life, we crave for everything perfect in between. A perfect friendship, love story, career, marriage, children, people.
What we forget is- Imperfections make us unique. There is no thing called perfection, it’s just a standard we’ve created around us. Perfection is in our mind. For a minute, instead of thinking “Shit, I was only 98% perfect, missed the spot by 2%. Try thinking Wow, I was just 2% imperfect”. See how just 1 word changes the whole notion.
Let’s accept our imperfections, and the imperfections of our relationships. It’ll just make us happier and content. And hey, happier people are just P.E.R.F.E.C.T 😉
Does this question come to your mind?
We grow up. We have crushes. We fall in love. And we get married- to the person we were in love or to someone our family chose for us. At the end we are happy, with someone we will spend the rest of our life; someone we call as our “ideal” Life partner.
But this word “Marriage” arises a very big question in my mind. Is it the end? Should it be the end? To all the past feelings?
I mean to ask- After marriage, should a person complete forget/erase the people from their past? What do they do when the people from past memories haunt them? Do they panic? Do they seek help from their partners? Will their partners question them/or their commitment?
An “IDEAL” Life partner wouldn’t just be one who cares, who loves, who listens, who pampers, who protects but someone who gives you the power to fight, someone who fights for you, someone who is ready to wait for the real YOU, someone who questions anyone who questions you and someone who holds your hand when your past memories haunt you, someone who is just right and much more.
Thinking of all that, one big question arises. Admist the big bad world, does this term “Ideal partner” exist or is it non-existent like Mayans?
An open ended question, to which I have no answers to!
“Some friendships are special enough that intentional distances hurt for a long long time”
Have you ever felt like a friend suddenly tries to maintain an intentional distance? I know all of us have lost friendships with time; wherein we or the other person has not been able to keep in touch, where in the distances came unintentionally. But what would u say to friendships where one of the friends consciously maintains a distance?
What do you do when you know that those friends are people you can always count upon. When you know those are the people who’d be the first ones to help you if you’re in a problem. When you know the conversations, however silly they may be, were enjoyed by both people. When you know there has never been misunderstandings or arguments. But still the friends move away, leaving you completely baffled without mentioning any reasons.
And when such things happen, it’s the friendship that suffers but it’s the people who suffer the most. The one who moves away consciously may or may not feel it much, but the other person who is just left wondering about the reasons literally breaks down thinking about what went wrong. There are times when people who’ve been left alone even think it was all their mistake but still they never reach the core problem. And the worst happens when the person doesn’t solve the maze of your mind, is unable to answer your questions. It happens once, the mind understands; but when it happens more than that, with almost similar situations; it’s baffling. It’s depressing, it’s irritating and it definitely takes away the peace of mind.
Such things happen, yet life moves on. With a hint of sadness within, only to wish those distances wear off!!
I help a friend and feel happy. But I do expect them to help me when you need them..
I like a guy. I take out time for him. I care for him. I expect him to do the same..
I get gifts for my family. I also expect them to get me gifts at some point of time..
I have guests at home and I’m the best host possible. I also expect them to treat me the same way when I go to their house..
And when these expectations are not met, we get hurt. Each person expects, either consciously or subconsciously. At times we are hurt , other times we hurt others. It’s a vicious circle.
It is said that we should do everything without any expectations , then Y do we keep them. If we know expectations hurt, then y do we keep them ? Y do we like to get hurt ?
It’s because we are humans. We are customized this way that we expect automatically. And every time our expectations are not met , we get hurt. Hurt is what helps us grow. Love is no doubt the ultimate thing which evolves us as a person, but until we have got hurt ,we don’t grow completely.
The day we stop expecting is when we grow complete. It’s the day we reach the ultimate stage. Though in today’s times, it’s close to impossible to reach there.
Do give it a thought.
Plans, plans & some more plans..
We often keep planning a lot for out present and our future for our professional & personal life. Our thoughts keep wandering in the future. And as a human being, we want something good to happen to us & we make N number of plans, without taking in account that someone else has a say on our life too. Even though our plans fail N number of times, we’d still make plans; because that’s human nature. Every time our plan fails, life changes & takes some other direction and our whole planning for the future goes down the drain.
It brings us to 1 question – Should we stop thinking or stop making plans? Should we just leave everything on God? Should we just sit idle?
The answer that justifies everything is – Make plans, think, but be prepared for everything (the good & the worst). The plan may or may not go according to you, it may be something exactly similar or something totally opposite. Understand that everything is not in your control except your thoughts. Never get disheartened by the final plan, because at the end it’s for your good.
We often keep looking at the smaller picture & end up neglecting the larger picture of life. If we look at it, we’ll realize that every decision, every plan, every failure has been of some significance & when we look back it brings a smile on our face. There may be a lot of incidents that have no explanation, but somewhere down the line you’d definitely get your answers.
All this comes from personal experience. My life has been a roller coaster ride. A lot of plans made & everytime something blasted it off. It does make me sad for a while but when I look at the larger picture of life, it gives me some peace & I have a faith that everything happens for a reason. Life does change in the wink of an eye, but we have to keep on moving. We have to keep on making plans without expectations, keep getting knocked down ; but stand up stronger every single time !
So if you’re going through a tough time, remember someone somewhere is planning the best for you. Every single incident in your life happens for some good reason. And get up & fight back 🙂